2018

Chapter 1: Ice and fire

20th Century Fox lot in Los Angeles
Television Critics Association 2018 winter press tour
January 2018

Gillian struggled to hold herself together during that horrible press conference. The looks David and Mitch gave her when she finally spoke the words they feared, broke her. She wanted to run, as far away as she could. She knew the press and the audience would see how she was feeling, it showed. Her face was stressed, cold, and worry lines showed. She really didn't want to be here right now. Her bubbly personality seemed gone, no giggles, no fun,... just plain, unhappy Gillian.

She tried to keep up her icy cool facade, but she failed. David felt her struggle, seeing her move uneasy in her seat, hearing her sighs next to him. He knew she was hurt, he knew how hard it was for her to hide her feelings, not speaking her mind like she was used to. He wanted to comfort her, but he knew he wasn't the right person now to do it.

Interview and press conferences used to be so much fun to do together. The always present chemistry they had, seemed to be gone forever. David tried to joke around, luring her out, but he failed. She ignored him completely, staring at the audience, not responding.

Her mind wandered around the room, trying to focus on something else, she didn't hear the questions that were asked or comments that were made. Her mind was set on leaving this hellhole, as soon as she could. She could feel David's attempts to make her laugh or to soothe her, but she couldn't stand him doing that. She wanted to scream and yell at him everything she was holding back. Her heart ached, she felt pain deep into her soul. Leaving the show was her way out, she needed to get as far away from this as soon as possible.

As soon as the photographers made their last shots, she left the stage, followed by David and Mitch. She paced up her speed, trying the best she could in her high heels, as they walked through the hallway to their taxi's. David wanted to grab her hand, but she avoided the touch, turning her face away from him.

As she started running, grabbing her belongings from her assistant, she completely broke down. Tears ran down her cheeks, sobs were heard, her hands covered her face. David tried to keep up with her, but her assistant held him back.

"Leave her... she needs time now!", she softly spoke to him.

The safeness of the car comforted her, in the corner of her eye she saw David run towards the car, waving his hand, trying to stop her, his face filled with worries.

She told her driver to get her to her hotel as fast as he could. The car departed with squeaking tires, driving away from David, leaving him alone in the parking lot.

Her eyes were red, filled with veins, her face flushed and wet with her tears.

"You ok Miss?" her driver asked.

She nodded softly meeting his eyes in the rearview mirror of the car.

Her phone beeped a few seconds after she left the underground parking.

Need to talk! - D.

Her eyebrow raised as she read the text. She ignored it and looked at the buildings driving through the city, feeling the winter sun warm her skin. Her heart was torn. She wanted to answer him, but she was protecting herself. It was hard ignoring him like that.

Gill, please! - D.

She read his second text. Tears started to well up again in her eyes. She felt so much pain not answering. He knew she had to attend some interviews still for her walk of fame ceremony, so she couldn't take the first flight back to London.

She got herself together and typed what was on her mind and pressed send. She closed her eyes, massaging her temple with her fingertips.

Nothing to say, nothing to talk about, everything is said! - G.

Hoping this feeling would go away, as easy as sending this message. Her driver was concerned. Normally they had a lot of fun during their drives, she was funny and giggly. Always in for a nice chat. But not today... he had never seen her like this before.

Some things were left unsaid. - D.

His texts were not helping. Every one of them hurt her even more. But she couldn't resist responding to him. In a way, she needed his attention, his words... although she knew it was killing her.

Dave, please don't make it harder than it already is! - G.

The car pulled up at her hotel. She didn't want to be in her house in Malibu, too big and too many memories. The suite she stayed in had all comfort she needed and above all, no aching memories to haunt her every night. She thanked her driver and excused herself from her bad company.

"Pick up my crew, and please tell them to enjoy themselves in the city, they get the day off, I just want to some time for myself. " she smiled softly at him and watched as the car drove off.

You can't leave me like this! - D.

Her heart ached reading his words on her screen. She entered her suite, kicked off her shoes and fell down on her queen-size bed. Her phone was in her hand, showing David's text. She sighed and decided to answer him although that seemed wrong. She loved him too much, leaving him without a proper answer. She gave in...

You are right. I can't... - G.

A few moments passed before she got a text back.

Where are you? Usual hotel or Malibu? - D.

This was so like David. He would move worlds for her, that was what she thought for so long. She knew he would be there in a few if she let him. She hesitated, still debating if this was a good idea inviting him to talk. But she needed to talk, the monsters in her mind had to leave. Maybe she could get some closure before she went back to London.

Oceana Beach Club - suite 4.2 - Knock 3 times. - G.

Fancy! On my way! - D.

and... thank you x - D.

Her thumb was still in the same place on her phone after she'd send her text. His two messages followed right after each other. Her heart ached, she wasn't ready for this.

She splashed water on her face, trying to hide her red eyes. Her makeup was wasted anyhow.

She replaced her jumpsuit with a casual shirt and pants.

She wanted to text him to cancel, her mind was puzzled, she couldn't think straight anymore.

But 3 firm knocks on the door startled her.

She took a deep breath, walked to the door and opened it.

Chapter 2: Breakdown
Summary:

"You wanted to talk, so talk..." she said in a serious tone as she sat down on the couch in the corner of her suite.

Chapter Text

Oceana Beach Club

LA

04:30 pm

The door opened, he waited patiently for her to let him in. She moved aside to let him enter the room. He walked across her suite to the big window - framed with white long curtains - with stunning ocean views. She closed the door and made her way towards him. He admired the view she had from this suite, moving his eyes slowly to her.

Her face was a mess, her eyes red and without sparks.

"You wanted to talk, so talk..." she said in a serious tone as she sat down on the couch in the corner of her suite.

He hesitated, he knew he had to be careful with her. Her painful expression made him cringe. She could snap in an instant, he had to be gentle and thoughtful.

"Gill..., I don't want us to part like this," he said softly and calm, reaching his hand out to her.

She laughed in disbelief, cold and hurt.

"You made me... YOU made me leave like this. I can't do this anymore! It is torture, Dave... don't you get that?! I poured my heart out, I told you how I felt and still feel. " she brought out, covering her face with her hand. She tried to hold back the tears, her lips trembled... she sobbed.

His face broke as he saw her cry, he couldn't stand seeing her like that. Normally he would have stepped over to her and to hold her in his arms, comforting her, but this wasn't the time.

Her pain hurt him as much.

" Gill, please... be calm. Why change all this, we were good together before? Getting together in secret, making out, giving fans things to talk about during interviews," he tried to talk some sense into her.

"I haven't forgotten our nights and moments filled with passion, fire, and love, in our trailers, the woods, hotel rooms, in the back of a car,..."

Her eyes looked up through her tears.

"Listen, this isn't just some game to me, this is my life and I am sick of playing games. My life has been one big joke until I decided to come clean, to be honest with myself and you.

Peter and I, that's all just an act, I told you that before. He needs me for his appearances. I am sick of that too, I am no trophy wife! I felt so used and abused by him in Portofino, that wasn't a part of the deal. And you are right, I don't smile when I am with him, that's because I don't like him, I don't love him!" her sobs prevented her from talking anymore.

He stared at her, her words still echoed in his head. He remembered her declaration of love towards him a few days ago. She told him during dinner at his place. She poured her heart out and he had reacted the wrong way, he knew that now. The countless passionate fucks they shared weren't just fun to her, she really loved him. He never realized that.

"I was a little offended by Portofino yes... I couldn't believe what I saw. That isn't you! Why..."

He hesitated.

"Why...?? I had no choice! Dave, you really think that I fuck that guy? That I cry out his name after a passionate make-out session? I don't! I hate him!

You know what happens when you and I are together. In interviews, photo shoots, tv shows, I can't hold myself back anymore, I can't hide it anymore, I can't keep my hands off of you. And I know you feel it and want it too! Don't you see the difference? " she cried. Her heart was broken by him.

He sat next to her on the couch, he wanted to hug her or wrap his arm around her, but he was afraid she wouldn't allow him.

She grabbed his hand and turned her flushed face at him. "Don't you see... you've really hurt me! You've crushed my heart. I know you love me above anything else, but you choose her? That servant girl? Just because you want to keep me as a backup, in secret? Because you don't want the fans to know. That's cruel! I don't deserve that!"

He listened and was crushed by her honest confessions.

"Monique and me, that's... " he started.

"That's what...!?" she snapped, "Sex, lust... she's is just a fucktoy, Dave, come on! You are acting like some old pervert rock star. Be honest with yourself!"

She stood up and walked away from the couch, turning her back to him.

"I have nothing more to say!"

His eyes traveled from her back to the floor. He sighed and swallowed hard. He knew he was causing her pain. He had turned her down, the one woman he truly loved. He made her feel like some backup secret lover he could fuck whenever he wanted.

He wasn't able to say to her what he really felt. His fling with Monique was just revenge, because of Gillian's Portofino adventure.

Why was it so hard telling her he felt the same for her. He knew she was the perfect woman for him.

"I do love you, Gillian! I hope you know..." he whispered standing behind her. She could feel his breath brush her hair.

"If you want me to leave, I will...! But I just wanted to tell you that you mean more to me than any other woman ever did. You have always been the one that makes me happy, made me smile, brought out the best in me. I haven't forgotten our nights together, our passion, our chemistry and I will never forget them. You are the best thing that came into my life, in these 25 years we've had our struggles and fights, but we grew stronger together.

I've known you for so long now, I just know you.

But I never thought you were here to stay, to commit to anyone, to me. I was under the impression you wanted to explore, to be free... no boundaries, no commitments.

A free spirit exploring the world.

But this afternoon at that press conference, that was so painful, I never wanted this. I don't care if you leave the show, I really don't, just don't leave ME. Not like this."

She had listened to his kind words, she was ready to give in to hug him and make love to him, but a little voice inside her mind held her back. Decisions had to be made. She turned around meeting his eyes.

He immediately connected with her gaze, waiting for her to speak.

"Your tour starts in a few weeks, will you go without her?" she asked.

"Arrangements have been made... I don't know... if I can change anything..."

She stopped him.

"All I needed to know!" she answered while making her way to the door. She opened it and waited for him to get the message. Her arms were crossed in front of her body.

He sighed, "Gill, please...". She didn't say a word, her eyes were on the floor waiting for him to pass her. In passing he brushed his fingers against her cheek, hoping she would meet his gaze.

His touch felt good like it always did, but she knew this was goodbye. She had to be strong to resist him.

He finally left. She couldn't stop herself from crying. She was heartbroken. She canceled most of her interviews and locked herself in her suite.

Chapter 3: Oceansong
Summary:

Decisions have to be made.

Notes:

Listen to this - D.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text

*Chapter 3: Oceansong*

Oceana Beach Club

LA

09:15 pm

No one had seen her in days. Even her assistant wasn't allowed in her room. She needed to be alone to process things, to think. David had texted her more than she could endure, but she had refused to answer him.

She sat in complete darkness and silence in her hotel room. The stillness helped her to calm down and to get her mind straight. She tried to process what had happened. The fans would be devastated her leaving their beloved show, she knew and felt bad. She had read the reactions on twitter. She didn't want to disappoint anyone, but she had to do this for her own health.

It had been an impulsive call she might regret later, but for now it was good leaving everything here.

She needed the cold and brutal honesty of Europe, London was calling her to come back.

California was her second home, David was too in a way. She loved him more than ever, but he had to make some decisions first. She had to prevent her heart from being broken again.

The soft beep of her phone woke her from her thoughts.

Listen to this - D.

Half life

Half my life by your side
Through thick and thin, rain or shine
You are closer to me
Than who I used to be
How can half of everything
Feel like less than nothing?
Afraid to open my eyes
To nothing but open skies

Someone else's girl

A woman makes a boy a man
And she makes a man a king
I don't want what's more than mine
I just want everything
A man makes a girl a woman
And he makes of a woman a queen
I kissed the ground you stand upon
And laid my sword down at your feet

Take my hand and don't be shy
The damage is done
Step up, look into my eyes
You made me someone else's guy

Someone else's guy
But how can I be
Your man now?

Spiral

How many times must I tell you?
How many times must I call?
Now there's a canyon between us
And through it, I start to fall
As I wake out of the spiral
I know it isn't your fault
When I tell you I love you, oh
I know you really don't care

She sighed, seeing he had sent her a few samples of songs on his new album. Her eyes pressed play on her iPhone. His voice, the lyrics, the words, the meaning behind it...

It cracked her heart open again. The wound couldn't heal this way!

All about you! x- D.

He couldn't leave her alone, he was drawn to her. He needed her in his life, but he was afraid it was too late. That she would leave California forever and never return. That she would break their bond, break their friendship, break him.

His sweet voice pierced her brain, his voice spoke to her, lyrics so meaningful and true. She listened, her eyes closed, her mind wandered off. The lyrics spoke to her, they told their complicated story, they cried out for her.

Her eyes stared out of her window. The waves were calm on this January evening.

The wild ocean called out to her. She left her suite and walked up to the private beach near the hotel. The cool Pacific breeze helped her to calm down. The lyrics still echoed in her mind and heart.

The sound of the waves crashing into the soft sand calmed her down. Her lunges filled itself with the purifying air, hoping her brain would be healed from her troubles.

Her eyes stared into the dark depths of the evening. The waves tried to touch her feet. She would miss these waves. She picked up sand and let it slip slowly through her fingers, a gesture so meaningful at this time in her life. Who would slip through her fingers and who wouldn't.

Her silent mind was startled by a familiar voice: "I knew I'd find you here!" was whispered.

In the pale moonlight she turned around meeting his gaze. "Dave..." she sighed, not knowing to be sad or happy, she just felt numb. Her face startled by his sudden appearance. Her eyes scanned his face. His face was still as handsome as it was 25 years ago, the lines the years had formed, added character to it. His eyes spoke to her, he looked worried.

"Walk with me," he said before she could speak. She softly nodded and walked up beside him. He had the ability to soothe her, to make her forget her rage, to slow her down, to talk some sense into her. He had always been the one who helped her through her panic attacks on set. He knew exactly how to approach her and how to calm her down. He was the only one she listened to.

They walked in complete silence next to each other. He suddenly stopped and turned his eyes to the ocean. The waves glistened in the moonlight.

"I've always liked moonlight walks near the ocean," he said in a low voice, "calms me down!" He moved his eyes from the ocean to her. She stood next to him, admiring the beautiful ocean she was saying goodbye to very soon. She felt his eyes on her and eventually dared to face him. Her eyes were cold, but as soon as they met his, the icy glare seemed to melt away. Her body wasn't able to resist him.

"I don't want you to say anything if you don't want to..." he whispered softly to her, seeing her eyes fill with tears.

"Just be here with me, at this moment, together."

A soft smile came to his lips, he was glad she didn't yell or pushed him away.

"I don't hate you David and I never will! she whispered meeting his eyes. "Maybe we need some time apart, to process things, to see what we really want." Her voice was soft.

The ocean witnessed this precious moment between two people who were clearly made for each other but were so blinded not to see. Their souls ached to be together, it was so obvious.

His hand reached out and touched her arm and found her fingers. She reacted by tangling them with his. She smiled as she glanced down and saw him holding her hand. Her eyes moved back up meeting his. The connection they had in that look spoke to them. Every shared memory sparked in their minds.

"I have to leave soon, I need to get back to London, to my kids. You will have your tour and fans deserve you at your best. I don't want to ruin that for you! The songs you've send me were touching and pure, I really felt it. Thank you for sharing that with me." Her words were kind and sweet. She couldn't be mad at him, she loved him too much.

He pulled her closer and wrapped his arms around her. He hoped she would allow that. The moonlight veiled some kind of softness on them. Her head fits perfectly under his chin. Her arms were around his waist. His hands rubbed her back. She had always felt good and secure in his arms. He had always been a very romantic and sweet guy to be around. He made her feel like a queen, he made her laugh with his silly jokes, he soothed her when things got difficult, he was always there for her. That feeling hasn't changed, it was still there.

"I will miss you!" he said, his eyes were sad and he realized he was saying goodbye to her for a long time.

Nestled against his chest, she felt his heart pounding and she listened to this breathing.

Finally she said "We need time. Our hearts and our minds need time, although it hurts me so much, I have to give you time to think. Maybe we should keep our conversations private instead on Twitter. Fans won't know what's happening and they will react, I'm sure, but I think we need this."

She turned her head up to meet his eyes. He looked down and agreed with what she had said.

"Will be hard though! It's fun to mess around with them." he responded and she smiled.

"My feelings won't change, I love you now and I will love you then." she whispered.

"Just be honest with yourself Dave, think about what you are doing with your life now. Think about West, she needs you as does your son. Be an example for them."

Her voice pierced his heart, she was so right.

"I have some thinking to do, as do you! Don't let him use you the way he did before! Be the strong woman you are! Focus on what's important, do your thing. Be wild and bold. You are adored by your fans. Try to grasp that and enjoy that love. Do cons, so you can see what impact you had and still have on girls, women and men. Be confident Gill, don't be so insecure. I'm sure it will give you energy and strength.

I know we aren't in the best place right now, but we can figure this out. We will." he hoped she would follow his advice.

His fingertips caressed her cheeks as he leaned in to kiss her. For a second she refused, doubt crossed her mind, she shouldn't be doing this.

But finally she gave in.

Although she was angry and hurt, he knew how to handle her.

Tears welled up and streamed down her cheeks the moment his lips touched hers. His kiss was soft and sweet, delicate and careful. His thumbs caressed her cheeks wiping the tears from her face. Her hand found his on her cheek. His lips danced over hers, he didn't want to force her to deepen their kiss. Her hand moved from his hand to his neck, pulling him closer. Her tongue entered his mouth and met his.

She gasped softly, knowing this was so wrong! She moved away, making his lip softly snap back.

"I... can't do this!" she sobbed, shaking her head.
Notes:

Tell me what you think.

Thanks for reading!

Chapter 4: I'll walk you back
Summary:

Saying goodbye or stay a while longer?

Notes:

Only the moon, the ocean and the stars witnessed their struggle.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text

*Chapter 4: I'll walk you back*

Oceana Beach Club - private beach

LA

10:54 pm

His hand was still holding hers. Only the moon, the ocean and the stars witnessed their struggle. Her eyes wandered over the sand towards the ocean. She hoped the ocean waves could calm her down. His hand gently squeezed hers, making her capture his eyes again. Her head was slightly tilted, her eyes fixed on him.

"I'll walk you back," he softly said, she heard his voice crack. Without a word they walked back to her suite, her hand still in his.

She knew if she would say goodbye at the door, it would be goodbye for a very very long time. She didn't know if she was ready to say those words to him. Her mind struggled, her soul tried to process things. If she invited him into her room, things would escalate, she knew for sure.

The walk up to her suite was silent, he brushed his thumb over her hand as they walked. She felt him draw reassuring circles with his thumb, it calmed her down. Doubt and wonder struck her, her mind was troubled, loving him had hurt her so much over the years, but still, she couldn't refuse or resist him.

The soft lights in the hallway were dimmed, it reminded her of the moonlight on the beach. Her keycard was flicked over the lock, beeping open her suite entrance. He hadn't let go of her hand. His fingers were still tangled with hers. His eyes stared at the floor, there was a sadness in his glare.

She licked her lips, noticing he was struggling to leave her there, it was as if he couldn't let go of her hand.

Their names were spoken and heard at the same time, it startled them they had whispered them together. It broke the awkward silence a bit, as they were forced to look at each other. She couldn't hold his gaze, her eyes couldn't handle the constant stare.

His look was sultry, he craved for her, his lips were slightly parted and his eyes were full of desire and pain. He couldn't just leave her there. He suddenly realized this was the last moment they had together. He knew he was the reason for her pain, but leaving her like this... felt impossible.

He pulled her hand closer, her body collapsed on his chest. His lips dove to her mouth. He moaned softly when his lips touched hers, a bittersweet collision. Her hands reacted and cupped his face, brushing her thumb against his cheek. Her knees were weak, his kisses always had that effect on her. He held her in his arms, pulling her closer, one hand in her hair, running his fingers through it. Their tongues danced in beautiful harmony as their lips parted to deepen the kiss.

The sensation brought back memories for them both. Nights of endless pleasure, lovemaking sessions during filming, lonely evenings spend in each other's arms, ...

She pushed the door of her suite open with her thigh. The kiss was broken for an instant, her look was hazy, her eyes love-struck, she couldn't think straight anymore. Her lips full and red from crashing with his. He stared back into her beautiful blue eyes, how could he be so stupid, hurting her like he did. Feelings of regret pierced his heart. Her hands guided him after her into the darkness of her room, the door closed after them.

His hands were in her hair, his lips wild on hers. His body pressed her against the wall. Her fingers pulled his hair as she felt his tongue slip between her lips meeting the warm depths of her mouth. His movements were full of passion, desire, love. He wanted her to know he loved her.

Her fingertips pinched his back, the soft fabric of his shirt prevent her nails to leave scratches.

Their breathing fastened, little gasps and moans broke the stillness of the room. His hand worked its way under her shirt, getting her to pull it over her head. He reconnected with her lips, as he walked his fingertips over her bare skin, brushing her neck, throat, over her breasts and stomach to her hip. He grabbed one thigh and as his hand moved to her knee her leg lifted from the floor. His fingertips squeezed her thigh as his mouth answered her craving. Her hips rocked against his, feeling his arousal grow.

She ripped his shirt open, she lost her patience. He chuckled, as he felt the fabric slide of his body. He lifted her up, automatically she hooked her ankles together behind his back. His mouth moved from hers to her jaw, her cheek, down her throat to her neck.

His arms guided her towards the softness of her bed as he laid her down. He fell on top of her, making sure his body didn't crush her. He hovered over her, admiring her beauty, his hands caressed her face and her lips. His fingertips guided her chin up to meet his passionate kiss again.

She was lost in his embrace, he made love to her like no other man ever could. But it was painful knowing that he had hurt her so much. But she wanted to say goodbye to him properly, she wasn't able to leave him without giving him a proper farewell. She was sure he would choose her sooner or later. She just knew. She had to give him this moment to remember, to cherish.

He sat on his knees between her legs, sliding her pants down. He felt her skin burn, he rubbed her soft legs and started a trail of licks, pecks, and kisses at the insides of her knees, moving over her thighs to her flat stomach reaching her bra.

Her back arched when his finger slid under the silk fabric. He was fast removing her bra, cupping her breasts gently with his hands.

As her hand moved to his trousers, his mouth kissed her breasts, his tongue swirled her nipples. Her body twitched at every caress and touch he gave her.

A trail of clothes told the story that unfolded tonight. They weren't ready to be parted by oceans, their hearts couldn't handle that yet. But time couldn't be stopped, the farewell was upon them.

A sound startled them, David's phone was ringing. They tried to ignore it, but the sound kept on going, over and over again. He crawled out of the bed, searching his phone in his pants in the pile of clothes. Gillian sat up straight wrapping a sheet around her shoulders and chest.

Her eyes followed his moves, in a way she was curious who was calling him.

He looked at the screen, he lightly sighed and declined the call. Again his phone started ringing, the same caller. "Got to take this, " he muttered and disappeared into the bathroom.

His voice was muted, but Gillian could still hear some of his words.

"You know I was going to call you" - "No..." -"... home soon" - "... yes I know you will..." "... love you too"-

She noticed that his voice wasn't annoyed with the call, his words came out rather kind and sweet. All kinds of theories troubled her mind. He is just playing with me - I mean nothing to him - That was Monique - I'm just his fucktoy - ...

Pain and despair welled up in her, rage and anger ignited in her stomach. Her fists dug deep into the sheets.

"Sorry, that was..." he whispered as he returned from the bathroom, he noticed her face all red and an angry sparkle in her eye, he thought he even saw a tear run down her cheek, he didn't continue his sentence.

"Hey, hey..." he said when he approached her, "What's wrong?". His fingertips brushed her cheek. He tried to pull her into his arms as he crawled back onto the bed.

An explosion of words followed, she couldn't hide her jealousy anymore, she was convinced Monique had called him. Tears streamed down her cheeks, he had never seen her rage like this. Her panic attacks could be bad sometimes, but this wasn't normal. She pushed him away from her. She stood up, wrapped in a sheet, her eyes wild and angry.

He refused to give in to her anger, he didn't say a word. He just stood there and listened.

Every frustration she had ever held back streamed out of her mouth, she poured her heart out.

He couldn't handle it anymore, he took his phone, pushed open the callerID menu, he threw his phone on the bed before her eyes.

Still rambling worlds and sentences her eyes looked at the screen.

Missed call

11:43 PM

West

Received call

11:44 PM - 2'56"

West

She slowed down, her voice faded away. Anger switched with embarrassment, she had assumed that he took a call for Monique while making love to her. Instead of Monique, it was his daughter West.

Her body numbed, her eyes on the screen. She couldn't speak, she felt so stupid, so childish.

The moment their eyes connected again, she could see the hurt and the pain in his eyes.

She gasped and muttered: "Dave... I... !"

"It was West, Gill... you really think I would...?!" he sighed, his voice trembled, his mind ached.
Notes:

*Thanks for reading*

Tell me what you think...

Chapter 5: Silence
Summary:

Farewells have to be said...

Notes:

The silence in the room wasn't calming, it was tense, awkward, unpleasant. A light breeze entered through the open window, the white curtains floated softly on the air entering the suite. Moonlight peeped through the cracks, the night sky was filled with millions of stars, some would think it was incredibly romantic, others would hate it.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text

*Chapter 5: Silence*

Oceana Beach Club - suite 4.2

LA

11:57 pm

Silence allows the brain to think,

the mind to relax,

the soul to revive.

The silence in the room wasn't calming, it was tense, awkward, unpleasant. A light breeze entered through the open window, the white curtains floated softly on the air entering the suite. Moonlight peeped through the cracks, the night sky was filled with millions of stars, some would think it was incredibly romantic, others would hate it.

His phone was still in the same spot where he left it. Next, to it, a petite frame curled up wrapped in sheets sobbing softly. The moonlight reached his feet, he sat on the couch in the corner of the room. His head rested in his hands, he tried to calm down, being silent for a while helped to soothe his mind. He just couldn't accept the way she acted, the way she assumed things.

In a way, he was flattered by her jealousy, and of course, she had reasons to think these things. Monique existed and indeed he had some kind of "relationship" with her. Nothing deep, or meaningful if you liked to call it, that was. She was easy, young and always in the mood.

His own thought scared him, he realized Gillian was right about her dirty rock star comment.

The difference was that the only one who could get him angry or could make him smile was the one lying on the bed. He only experienced big emotions around her. She had this awkward effect on him. He had thought about it on many sleepless nights, what it all meant, and he came to the conclusion that she must be very important to him. Maybe so that he couldn't live without her, he knew her longer than half of his life.

That's what made this so hard. Their feelings and emotions could get so out of hand, they could get hurt. He was torn between consoling her or confronting her with his thoughts and feelings. At this time she was so fragile, so vulnerable, he had seen this sight of her before, but she was good at hiding this aspect of her character. But he figured, she couldn't hold herself back anymore, she broke down in front of him a few moments ago.

His heart ached to hear and see her like this, he struggled to accept the fact that this beautiful human being, his best friend, his love, his favorite female next to West, wasn't happy with her life. She had it all, an amazing career, loved all over the world, adored by men and women, amazing ambitions and capacities.

She just had a bad taste in men, always picked out the wrong ones. It made him afraid that he wasn't good for her same as the others. In fact, he wasn't good for her, he had hurt her with his fling Monique. She could fall in love head over heels, losing every bit a sanity. Over the years he had seen her heartbroken more than once. He was there for her every time.

Men had abused and used her over and over again. The warning signs along the way she always seemed to miss.

That's one of the reasons he never really wanted a real relationship with her, afraid to be added to the list of bad choices. He didn't want to be a bad choice. He knew they were attracted in a very high level to each other, sometimes the chemistry was out of this world. But still, he was so afraid being the worst choice she had ever made, although he knew he was a gentleman, he never treated a woman badly, he always respected boundaries. The problem with Gillian was that she didn't have any boundaries. He was disgusted with men who kept using her, he felt very protective of her.

One night, years ago, he heard screams coming from her trailer. He had to break open the door to see some pig raise his fist at her wanting to hit her a second time. He almost lost his temper there with this scumbag, he had kicked him out with violence. It had been years ago but he still remembered having to nurse her wounds and hold and comfort her all night, because she was so afraid that guy would come back.

He rubbed his hands through his face and stood up from the couch. He took his phone and texted West that she didn't have to be worried, he added he didn't know when he would be home. He walked up to the bedside table and laid his phone down.

His hand caressed her wrapped up body on the soft sheet.

"Hey, it's ok... stop crying..." he whispered nestling his face in the back of her neck. "No it's not," she replied softly turning her head to meet him. "I went too far, I was wrong, there was no need to yell and being this bitch to you!" she continued ashamed of her actions.

"I know you, Gill, you are fire and ice in one. I do understand your reaction. Your jealousy isn't healthy, but in a way, it's flattering though." he tried to console her speaking softly in her ear. His body spooned hers, his arm fell softly over her covered thigh, her head fell back against his shoulder. He felt her relax a bit more after his words.

"But I think you know me well enough, to realize I would never take a call from Monique, being with you! We talked about that before, you told me how hard it was for you seeing me with her. I don't want to hurt you even more than I already did Gill...!" His lips touched her cheek as he talked. She felt his breath on her face.

Hurt, pain, love, sorrow, it was all there.

"It's better for me to head back to London..." she said to him, her eyes screamed, turning her face to him. He shook his head lightly, his mouth wanted to speak, but words refused to leave his mouth. "Some time away from each other might help..." she continued.

"I... I refuse..." he muttered, trying to form a sentence.

She turned around and placed her finger on his lips preventing him to speak.

"It's for the best!" she whispered trying to hide the hurt in her voice. "Don't do this..." he answered, his voice crackled, trying to hold back his tears.

Her hand cupped his face, her eyes looked into his, trying to let him understand how much this was hurting her to make this decision.

She took a deep breath, closing her eyes as she filled her lungs, her eyes reconnected with his. This was the hardest goodbye, they had ever had to make. No words were spoken, his arms wrapped around her, pulling her close to his chest. Her arms reacted to his embrace, pulling him closer as well. Her head nestled on his shoulder, his arms caressed her back in soft strokes.

They sat silently together on her bed, tangled in a sweet, but painful embrace. None of them wanted to let go. Tears streamed down their cheeks, sobs were heard.

"My plane leaves tomorrow afternoon," she whispered against his neck. She felt his reaction, his heartbeat fastened and his embrace became tighter. She felt him kiss her neck and shoulder softly, his thumbs rubbed her spine.

"Let me at least stay with you tonight..." his voice was weak and soft.

She nodded and loosened their embrace to meet his eyes.

Nestling under the covers, their skins touched, spooning in an embrace none of them ever wanted to leave.

Notes:

Thank you for reading my story...

Chapter 6: Oceans apart
Summary:

Gillian leaves LA and arrives in London.

Notes:

The complicated relationship they shared had survived many storms, but she feared if it wouldn't survive this one.

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text

*Chapter 6: Oceans apart*

Somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean

I miss you.

Not in some cheesy, let's hold hands and be together forever kind of way.

I just miss you.

Plain and simple.

I miss your presence in my life.

I miss you always being there for me.

I miss my best friend.

Her mind wandered off... her veins, heart, and mind ached. The sounds inside the plane took over, she hated them, but now they took her thoughts away from him. Her eyes tried to focus on something during the flight, but her mind was troubled.

She tried not to miss him, she tried to let go, but in the end, he was always on her mind.

David had left early that morning. They had spent their last night together, wrapped up in each other's arms, not able to say goodbye. She would always remember this last night together. Just being there together, holding one another, without anything else. It surprised her a night like that could be so satisfying, but the connection was just there, it was all they ever needed. The complicated relationship they shared had survived many storms, but she feared if it wouldn't survive this one.

He had kissed her one last time at the door before he left, his lips pressed softly to hers, his fingers touched her cheek gently. They held hands, gazed into each other's eyes, they felt their chemistry burning between them. It was so obvious they couldn't ignore the fact it was there.

"I guess this is goodbye then," he whispered hugging her one last time. Her lips touched his cheek lightly as she said: "Goodbye for a long long time!".

"We will figure this out, right?" he asked rubbing her back as he held her close.

She sighed and answered: "We always do...".

From the moment his warm arms left her body, she felt alone, cold and abandoned. She watched him walk down the hallway, turning his head one last time, to eventually disappear through the door.

She remembered their agreement, no more twitter conversations, making the fans crazy. They had to figure their troubles out first, behind the scenes. They had some thinking to do, both of them knew what they felt, but both were too stubborn to give in. A decision had to be made, time apart should help them figure things out. No more public things for the two of them, until they made up their minds.

She finally dozed off in her seat, dreams about the night and days before playing in her head.

***

London - Gillian's place

01:19 PM

The driver helped her with her bags, as she finally set foot into her own house, since forever. It felt so good to be home at last. She was jetlagged, lucky for her the boys were with Mark. Although she ached to see them again after this time, she could really use the silence of her house.

Got home safe? x D.

Her sleepy eyes smiled reading his text. She was confused he was texting her at this time. It was around 5 AM in the morning in LA.

London baby! - jetlagged! Go back to sleep! x G.

Couldn't sleep anyway... x D.

She left her bags in the hallway and snuggled on her comfy couch she had missed so much. She wrapped a blanket around her legs and stared out the window. The genitor had taken care of the heating, the fireplace was on and had warmed the living room already. She was mesmerized by the flames, they always did something to her. London could really be depressing this time of year. Dark grey skies, grumpy people, cold, almost no sunlight, while LA was sunny and warm and had David. She shook her head, that thought startled her. She didn't want to think about him, but in some way she still did.

fireplace

Light my fire! x G.

She just wanted to share a picture of the fireplace with him. But her naughty mouth took over sending him that message. She couldn't undo the message anymore.

Legs fireplace

Cabin in the woods 2.0? Can't forget that! x D.

She giggled and smiled widely reading his message and seeing the picture of their tangled legs in front of the fire.

Of course, she remembered that night.

A cold December night a few years ago, they spend together in an abandoned cabin in the mountains. David's granddad once bought it to go hunting. It was a hidden gem.

They had to hike all day through the snow to reach it.

Wooden beams, stone fireplace, incredibly romantic, on the slope of a mountain, miles away from civilization. They liked some time away from the always busy cities they lived in. This was their hideaway, their shelter, their love nest, their secret.

The fireplace had warmed the whole cabin, they had nestled themselves into the bed in front of it to get warm. No cell phone connection or WIFI up there, they just had each other. Candles were lit and filled the rooms with warm soft light. His arms were around her as her head rested on his chest. Her tiny body was covered with soft, warm sheets. Although she was naked next to him, the fire kept her warm while the freezing winds howled outside the window. He pulled her closer and softly kissed her hair. She looked up to meet his eyes. He lips reached out to meet him as he met her gaze. He smiled "Hi there" he whispered while brushing a strand of hair out of her face tucking it behind her ear, she smiled "Make love to me Dave..." she whispered back.

His lips crashed on hers, his one hand held her face while his other rubbed her side. Their tongues met and fireworks ignited in their stomachs. The longer the kiss lasted the more passionate it became. Soft moans escaped their mouths as they both needed to catch their breaths. She crawled up his chest and settled in his lap. His back pressed on the soft mattress, he looks up and admired her beautiful body. Her hips grind and rocked over his core. His hands cupped her breasts, squeezing them gently as she rode him. He brought his lips to the sensitive tips and swirled his tongue around them, switching sides. His fingertips helped him by rolling her nipples between his fingers. She gasped at the sensation he caused in her chest.

Her hands guided his head in its conquest of her breasts. His warm breath made her shiver as it reached her flushed skin. Her head fell back as she felt him responding to her grinding. She felt his arousal grow with every move she made.

He groaned feeling his erection ache under her heavenly center. He was ready for her, she felt his thumb slip between her legs, circling her most sensitive spot. She cried out his name and moaned. Her movements paced up. Her hips rocked him hard. He guided her gently over his hard shaft. He hissed when he felt her walls hug him completely. Her eyes rolled back, her lips parted and she let her body fall over him completely. He felt so divine inside her.

His thrusts were steady and firm, she felt him slide in and out of her as her muscles releases and contracted. Over and over again, faster and faster. His hands held her hips and guided her movements. The repeated friction resulted in explosions inside her stomach, she grabbed his biceps and pinched them. She cried out his name, while her body shivered with the heavenly sensation he had created.

He reacted to her lasting orgasm, feeling waterfalls of happiness spreading in his chest, as she fell down one last time over him. He held her close as his pace slowed down. They panted and sighed in the release. Her body fell on his chest as his arms gloved around her.

She remembered their cuddles in front of the fireplace. Her daydream had awoken repressed feelings of that night. That night with him was heaven, passion, love, and lust so much more.

Can't believe you still have that picture!

We almost created an avalanche. Wonderful memory. x G.

These memories warm my heart. But they make me miss you even more Gill! x D.

She read the text, her heart melted when she read that he missed her. But she had to be honest, she loved him, but he still had M...

Notes:

She tried not to miss him, she tried to let go, but in the end, he was always on her mind.

Thank you for reading!

Let me know what you think...

Chapter 7: Surprise
Summary:

Gillian receives a surprise...

Notes:

"Like a wave out on the ocean, I will always come right back to you."

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text

*Chapter 7: Surprise*

London - Gillian's place

A few days later - January

06:21 PM

"Like a wave out on the ocean, I will always come right back to you."

Days went by this cold January month, days and nights she had spend texting and talking on the phone with him. David wasn't able to give her the time and rest she needed. She allowed him to call her and to keep her busy texting all night. Their conversations were funny, sweet and hot sometimes. His sweet voice warmed her heart, sweet words filled her chest with the love she needed so badly.

She could, however, keep him on a distance to protect herself. Her heart ached, she craved to be with him, she needed his presence. But she could set some boundaries, she knew this was flirting. She often wondered when he slept... the major time difference didn't seem to bother him much, he was always answering her texts.

Her mind always drifted off to him, the thought of him, his presence, his voice, his warm arms around her. She looked out of her window overlooking the city, the city lights and sounds distracted her for a second. She liked being inside her cozy home, seeing the city like this. She didn't like strolling through the streets that much, people recognizing her, asking her questions, she just didn't like to talk to people at times.

This time she needed time for herself, to think. To set her mind straight, to know what was good and what was not. To make decisions...

She snuggled under her warm blanket, sipping her tea, dreaming about what would and could happen. Nelson kept her company, he was snoring at her feet. She smiled at the sight of him.

Her cozy moment with her dog was interrupted by a familiar sound coming from her cell phone.

In for a surprise? x D.

She smiled at the words on her screen. What was he up to now? He really spoiled her with his attention. She was so afraid to give in because it could disappear so suddenly again. She thought about her answer. She couldn't figure out what he meant with it. Her curious self couldn't resist, she needed to know what the surprise was.

You know me... tell me more! x G.

Open the door. x D.

She had to catch her breath reading his words. What was his point? For a second she thought he might be waiting at her doorstep, her heart raced, but that was not possible. He could be crazy at times, but that crazy to travel all over the world just to see her.

She left her warm blanket, Nelson looked up, not knowing what was happening.

She walked towards the door, wearing an old oversized sweater and comfy pants, she didn't know what to hope for. She held her breath as her hand found the lock. The door opened slowly, her eyes searched the area to find a clue.

A white envelope was on the doorstep. She picked it up and took it inside. In a way she felt disappointed, she had hoped it was him waiting at her door. She knew it was impossible, but still... it would be incredibly romantic if that would happen. Although she wasn't into romantic stuff, David had some influence on that. He showed her during the years romantic gestures that touched her heart more than she would admit. He could be very thoughtful and romantic, she loved it, because it came from him. Other men couldn't impress her with romantic stuff.

Found it? x D.

Her hands held the envelope as she made her way back to Nelson.

Open it! x D.

He didn't allow her to answer his texts. Her hands ripped the soft paper and her eyes looked inside. She found a keycard inside and a little note.

Dress up - the driver is waiting for you

The note didn't say anything more. Her mind couldn't think anymore. What is this? What is he doing?

All kinds of thoughts crossed her mind.

What is this, Dave? x G.

SURPRISE... my lips are sealed! x D.

She smiled seeing his cheeky response, that was so him. She had no choice, but doing what the note said.

Standing inside her oversized dressing, her mind went into overdrive. Normally she relied on her assistant to help her with clothing choices, makeup, and hair for special occasions. Now she was on her own. She picked a nice form fitted knee-length black dress with a subtle slit on the side. It was elegant, classy and also added a hint of sexiness. She didn't know what or where she would end up, so she had to prepare for everything.

After her shower, she slipped into the dress she had chosen.

It hugged her curves very well, the cleavage it showed was very subtle, but also very sexy. The thigh high stockings gave her legs a healthy glow. The high heels perfected the look she was going for.

She preferred natural makeup, nothing over the top, a black line to accentuate her beautiful eyes, a golden glow on her cheekbones and red lipstick to finish it off. She always struggled with her hair. But this time it worked with her. She pinned it back, but soft curls slipped out which gave her a sophisticated style.

A fine gold necklace was draped on her collarbone.

She looked at herself in the mirror. She looked elegant and still sexy. She didn't know what to expect, her mind struggled to process her thoughts. On her way out she grabbed her clutch, her phone, the mysterious keycard and she draped her coat over her shoulders.

The driver noticed her leaving her house, he opened the door to allow her to step into the car.

"Evening Miss Anderson," he said very sophisticatedly in his London accent. She smiled and asked him where he was bringing her.

"Sorry, miss, I got orders not to tell you," he replied with a cheeky smile.

She grinned and tried to enjoy the ride through her beloved London. Her mind tried to figure out where the car was driving her.

The driver took her outside the busy city, the London countryside was veiled in the evening mist.

Suddenly the car turned into a lane with tall oaks on both sides. The long driveway stopped at an old static mansion with a stone staircase leading to the front door.

The driver helped her out of the car and escorted her to the front door.

The door wasn't fully closed, she pushed the door open, it revealed a beautiful open space with a massive staircase in the middle. In a way, it reminded her of a scene out of Beauty and the beast.

There was a table in the middle of the room, on it a card with directions.

She was a little freaked out by the mysteries of it all. But she trusted David, this was his surprise, so she had to go with it. The directions on the card led her up the beautiful staircase leading to a grand hallway. The hallway was lit with candles on each side of the path, it led her to a door on the west side of the house. It was the only door with a keycard lock.

She took a deep breath and flicked the keycard over the lock. The light went from red to green, her cue to enter the room.

Before she entered, she checked her dress and filled her lungs with air which gave her the courage to step into the room.

Notes:

Let me know what you think!

Chapter 8: Tonight
Summary:

The best things happen unexpectedly

Notes:

...and tonight I'll fall asleep with you in my heart...

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text

*Chapter 8: Tonight*

Old manor Mansion - Westwing

9:54 pm

...and tonight I'll fall asleep with you in my heart...

As the wooden door slowly opened, she stepped into the dark room. Her eyes needed time to adapt themselves to the dimmed light in the room, her skin was tingling, her nerves were tense and her heart raced in her chest. She was nervous, not knowing what or who to expect.

Her eyes traveled around the spacious room, it was a big open oval space, with big high windows around it. Long white curtains framed the static windows. There were candles lit at various places in the room. She still struggled with her vision. The designs on the floor were so beautiful, normally she would take the time to admire the craftsmanship of the room. Crystal chandeliers hung from the ceiling, this room was high class.

Once she reached the middle of the big space as a soft voice spoke to her.

"Surprised?"

She saw a shadow standing on the balcony outside the room, the moonlight veiled over him, she couldn't see who it was. She was so startled by the voice, she wasn't able to recognize it right away. She pinched her eyes to sharpen her view. The dark figure stepped into the room, as soon as the candlelight reached his face she couldn't believe her eyes.

Her eyes locked with his when he stepped closer towards her. Her lips formed a smile and her heartbeat was out of control. He approached her slowly, he was wearing a black tux, white crisp shirt, tanned skin, brown hair, and mesmerizing hazel eyes. She couldn't focus on anything else.

"Is it really you?" she spoke with a tremble in her voice.

He grabbed her hands when he reached her, his eyes never left her gaze. She felt herself shiver at his touch.

He nodded in response and smiled widely.

"I suppose that means you are happy to see me?" he smirked as he pulled her closer. She felt her feet walk between his, her body pressed against his, his arms gloved around her waist as her face was forced to look up to keep his gaze. Her hands moved over his arms to his neck as she leaned in to kiss him.

"You look incredibly stunning," he whispered before her lips reached his.

Her lips pressed lightly to his, he reacted by lightly sucking her bottom lip between his soft lips. A soft moan escaped her mouth when he kissed her back, gently entering his tongue into her craving mouth. Her hands guided his head closer to her, his arms moved up her back to cup her face.

Standing in the middle of that stunning room, they forgot time and space, time stood still. For a moment, they lost themselves completely in each other. Their kisses were sweet and hungry at the same time. Their bodies ached to be held by one another.

She had to catch her breath, but if it were possible she could kiss him for hours, days even months, her lips disconnected with his. Her eyes scanned his face and searched his eyes immediately. As they met she smiled widely.

"I can't truly believe you are really here, Dave!" she said in disbelieve, his hand brushed her cheek and his eyes reassured her it was real.

He smiled, still holding her close to his chest, gently stroking her cheek and hair.

"It's clear to me we need each other's presence," he said softly against her temple.

"But why this place? You know you can always stop by at my place? You still have your key, don't you?" she breathed against his chest.

"This is my way to surprise you," he answered.

He broke the loving embrace they were in and held her hand. He guided her to a table in a dark corner of the room. "I guess you haven't eaten anything?" he presumed. She nodded, she often forgot to eat, he knew her so well. She had the bad habit of skipping meals, not because she didn't have the time to eat, just because she didn't think about it.

The roundtable was filled with delicious tapas and small dishes they both liked. Red wine complemented the food perfectly. They enjoyed each other's company, giggles were heard and conversations were held. Small steps were traveling towards their hearts.

His hand was on hers while sitting at the small table. They were very relaxed, talking and laughing forgetting their struggles and worries from before.

"Have I told you, you look amazing tonight?" he complimented her again while she was sipping her wine. "You spoil me with your compliments" she smirked squeezing his hand. Her eyes laughed and the little sparkles that once were seemed to reappear.

A little tipsy from the delicious Italian wine, she stood up, giddy and still holding his hand, locking her eyes with his. He looked at her small petite figure, wobbling before him. She giggled and was totally relaxed. He loved her like that, with any worries and doubts. This complex woman was so wonderful.

"Dance with me!" she laughed, thinking he wouldn't dare. He stood up and pulled her hand so she was forced to land hard against his chest. She chuckled. Holding her with one arm, his free hand grabbed his phone, searching his inventory for a perfect song. He pressed play and the sweet tunes of Neil Young's "Helpless" started to fill the candlelight lit room.

He held her close, holding her hand to his heart, while his other arm snaked her tiny waist. Her head rested against his firm chest, as he swayed her over the floor. The song reminded them of better times. The time she joined him at his New York gig, the fans went crazy when she joined him on stage. In her excitement, she had kissed him almost too passionately in front of the audience. She never regretted that kiss, neither would he. But their affair back then was so obvious, they were too in love to hide it any longer.

They looked like the perfect couple dancing in the middle of an abandoned room. Everything around them disappeared, the only thing that existed, was them. Moonlight peeped through the open windows and gave the room a romantic, yet mystical glow. Her head stayed on his chest, she followed his movements, he guided her over the floor.

His movements slowed down as the music died. They just stood there, holding each other in a romantic embrace, none of them wanted to let go. His hands rubbed her back, she listened to his steady heartbeat, once she noticed he stopped moving she searched his eyes. The moment they met, his eyes smiled looking down at her.

"Thank you... I'm... so..." she whispered, her breath brushed his cheek, her face nestled in the crook of his neck. He felt her body weaken under his touch. The wine got to her, the heavy emotions from the past days and weeks drained her, she was exhausted. Like a ragdoll, she collapsed in his arms.

He scooped her into his strong arms, her arm was loosely around his neck, his arms hooked under her knees. Her head rested on his shoulder. The emotions had exhausted her. She felt so secure in his arms, the combination of alcohol, emotions and the heavenly dance finally floored her. Her body gave in, it surrendered.

He carried her down the stairs and gently laid her down in the car which was still waiting at the mansion. He joined her in the backseat, letting her head fall in his lap. He caressed her cheek and admired her perfect pale porcelain face. The car left the long driveway and headed back to the city.

Sometimes you can't explain what you feel for a person, you just feel it.

He felt it, this was real!

Notes:

*Sometimes you can't explain what you feel for a person, you just feel it.*

Thank you for reading.

Tell me what you think...

Chapter 9: Home again
Summary:

ATTHS

Notes:

* Making love was never about you and me in a bed. We made love whenever we held hands. *

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text

* Chapter 9: Home again*

Gillian's place - London

around midnight

* Making love was never about you and me in a bed. We made love whenever we held hands. *

The ride back through the busy city of London to her place took a while, her head rested on his shoulder, her arms rested relaxed in his lap. His arms were draped around her, he softly stroked her hair. She was so tiny next to him. Her porcelain skin was flawless, he touched her cheek lightly to let her know they had almost arrived at her place.

Her eyes moved, but she seemed to struggle to open them. His hand traveled over her body, resting on her waist. He stared at her, he scanned her perfect face, his mind was puzzled. He knew this was the woman he loved. He leaned in, his lips brushed her cheek "We have arrived, let me carry you." He kissed her cheek lightly as he moved away.

The driver opened the door of the cab and David scooped her into his arms and carried her carefully out of the car. "Thanks, man," he thanked the driver and tipped him generously.

He walked up to the front door and opened it with the spare key, she gave him years ago. He slipped inside like a thief in the night. He knew his way around her house like no other. He had visited her several times before, but this was different. The setting had changed.

It was just like he remembered, very elegant, stylish with a crazy Gillian twist to it. Some precious artwork from Piper and lovely drawings from Oscar and Felix were in elegant frames on the wall. In the dining area, she had decorated an entire wall with all kinds of pictures. She liked her memories, she liked pictures, it kept the memory alive. Her iPhone was swamped with selfies and photos.

As he walked with her in his arms through her house, he noticed she removed every photograph of them together. She used to have seve

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